Why change?
You might be a rare enlightened individual who is able to rise above the challenges and problems of the everyday, and who is very satisfied with your life.
Or you might like to change some of the unhelpful patterns that have set into your adult life – like, changing how you relate to other people, worrying less about the future, and moving on from a difficult or painful past.
A time for change?
Spring is traditionally seen as a time of new growth in nature – the weather warms, plants bloom, animals and humans emerge from hibernation. We often have more energy in spring, so conditions for personal change are favourable.
How long does it take?
We live in a time of instant gratification where we are used to everything happening quickly: instant downloads, instant food, instant communication.
Change takes time, but it can begin with just one step.
Once you’ve committed to it, you might find that you’re moving forward some days, while at other times it can feel like you’ve slipped backwards. When that happens, it’s important to go easy and tell yourself, ‘It’s okay, I’ve made a start. Some days are going to be easier than others.’
Change is uncomfortable.
Change can feel like a walk up a steep mountain. At times you might feel like giving up, need to refuel or take time out for a rest. You might tell yourself, ‘I can’t do this’ or ‘this is wayyy too hard’ but when you reach the summit and look out across the beautiful landscape on the other side, you realise that the effort was worth it. In fact, without this work the experience might not seem as sweet.
Change on my terms.
Do people in your life tell you that you ‘should’ go and see someone to talk about your problems? You’re interested to make changes, but you don’t want other people telling you how or when to do it!
Have you ever made a grand pronouncement about something you intend to change only to realise that you’ve bitten off more than you can chew, and in a very public way? When we do this, we often put pressure on ourselves and set ourselves up to experience a sense of failure – or worse, that ‘I’m a failure’.
Initiating change rather than feeling pushed into it, taking a step-by-little-step approach, and being kind to yourself along the way is another option.
How do I start?
It can often be easier to walk the change path supported by another person, someone who can encourage you to keep moving forward through difficult terrain, and who can listen with empathy when it all feels too hard.
Change is uncomfortable but having someone to support you through it can really help. For some people, it can be helpful to seek out the support of a qualified counsellor.